Ode to a Bum

Vesper from Girls Out West

Being sat on all day does you no harm

It robs you of none of your cheeky charm

Though your owner thinks that you're too fat

You are what I most fervently long to pat

Even when you were sitting upon the crapper

You inspired a song from LL Cool Jay the rapper

Millions of guys dream of you while wanking

But what you most desire is a painful spanking

Hidden deep between your fleshy globes

Is a tight little hole that welcomes probes

Let me slide my hotdog between your buns

You inspirer of some of my cheesiest puns

I know you can't hear me as you have no ears

But you really are the queen of all the rears

You sublime and sensuous panty stretcher

Inspirer of unending lust in this dirty lecher