The Insufficiency of Sporks : Wank Wednesday

Well it's Wednesday, so don't be a wanker (in the negative sense), join in the fun and be a wanker (in the positive sense). Wank Wednesday is a Twitter-based writing challenge created by Ruby Kiddell over at The Erotic Notebook. Go over there to find the other naughty stories and make sure to encourage the writers with full measure of feedback.

The Insufficiency of Sporks

I have to warn you, dear reader, that the tale I am about to relate is a gruesome one. It may make you feel sick to your stomach, as it deals with one of humanity's great taboos - the act of cunnilingus - the eating out of the human pussy. Of course we know that primitive tribes of lesbians used to engage in cunnilingism. Cunnilinguals sometimes even believed that they could take upon themselves the strengths and abilities of those whose cunts they ate.

But in this modern world of strap-ons, vibrators, nipple clamps and butt plugs, such barbaric and disgusting behaviour can be avoided. Most of the time.

This is the true story of the Dakota Dykes roller derby team whose plane crashed in the Andes, jamming shut the luggage compartment door and depriving them of access to their sex toys for one whole week. What happened to these girls - the depths to which they had to sink for their own survival - is a queasy tale, but keep in mind that it is also a tale of heroism, of the indomitability of the human spirit in adverse conditions. They may have resorted to truly nauseating behaviour in order to survive, but the fact is that they came out of those mountains alive!

"Oh, my God, we're going down!" cried Wrecking Yard Rita, as the engine on the left wing burst into flames and the plane's nose dipped toward the craggy mountain peak below.

"Please remain calm and assume the crash position!" screamed the stewardess hysterically.

The pilot set the autopilot to crash mode, ran out of the cockpit, opened the fuselage door and jumped out, pulling the chord on his parachute just in time to prevent himself from being impaled on a rocky outcrop. The wind carried him aloft and then he began his slow descent. Fourteen hours later he would land in the centre of Santiago.

The body of the plane collided with the snowy mountain in a prolong scream of tortured metal. The girls were tossed around the cabin like snow in a Christmas paper weight, but it was no worse than what happened to them most nights on the roller derby rink. Luckily none of them were seriously injured.

Sally, the stewardess, had landed on top of Tanya Hide, the captain of the team.

"Ouch, I think I broke my bottom," she complained.

"You'll live," grumbled Hide, "just go sit in the snow to numb the pain."

"Everyone O.K.?" asked Grotty Gertie, surveying her tumbulated team mates.

"I could use a drink," piped up Bulldozer Betty, whose head was jammed between two seats and whose feet were tangled in the oxygen masks above.

It didn't take them long to extricate themselves from their seats and exit the plane. It was then that they discovered the bad news. The plane was on an angle with the baggage compartment door on the underside.

"It'll take about a week for a rescue party to get up here into the mountains," said Dora the Destroyer grimly. "In the meantime, we need to survive."

"There are plenty of chocolate bars and stale sandwiches in the pantry," pointed out Sally.

"Yes," said Dora, "food won't be a problem. But keeping warm will be. We need to have sex and lots of it."

"But our strap-ons are in the luggage compartment," pointed out Gertie, "and we can't get to them."

"We're going to have to improvise," said Tanya bravely. "What is there in the cabin that we could use to get off?" she asked Sally.

"Well, there are eating utensils," Sally suggested.

"What kind of eating utensils?" asked Dora.

"150 individually wrapped plastic sporks," she replied.

"What's a spork?" asked Betty.

"You've seen them," Sally explained, "half spoon half fork. They combine the scooping ability of a fork with the skewering ability of a spoon."

"Shouldn't that be the other way around?" asked Betty.

"You've obviously never tried to use one," replied Sally.

"O.K. everybody, nude up!" ordered Tanya, once they were back in the plane and had unwrapped the sporks. "And that includes you, honey," she added, squeezing Sally's ass.

"I've never done lesbian stuff before," explained Sally. "But I don't want to freeze, so I suppose I'll give it a go."

Soon they were all nude.

"What the fuck can we do with one of these?" asked Tanya, examining one of the sporks. "I think we need a couple to experiment. Any volunteers?"

Betty and Dora stuck their hands up.

Copyright: creatista / 123RF Stock Photo

"Spork me, baby!" cried Dora as she lay back on the floor of the cabin and spread her legs.

"Perhaps a little titillation first," suggested Betty dragging the tines tenderly over Dora's stiff nipples.

"I'm not getting much here," Dora complained. "Get rough. Spank my ass!" And she rolled over and stuck her firm butt in the air.

Betty held the handle of her spork between the finger and thumb of her left hand and then bent back the broad curved head of the utensil with the convex surface facing Dora's trembling behind. She let go and the spork tapped Betty lightly on her hungering flesh.

"Go ahead and do it," moaned Dora. "Don't hold back."

"I just did it," pointed out Betty.

"I didn't feel anything," Dora complained.

"Perhaps if I spank your clit with it," suggested Betty. They tried that. It was marginally better, but it wasn't going to get anybody off.

"This isn't going to work," Dora told them grimly. "There's only one thing left. None of us want this, I know. But our survival is at stake."

"You're not suggesting...?" began Betty.

"There's no alternative," she replied. "You'll have to draw straws. And the loser eats out my cunt."

Sally and Gertie began dry wretching, but the others put on a brave face.

Tanya drew the short straw.

"It's probably appropriate that I, being your Captain, should lead you into this dark territory," she told them.

And so it was that she crouched down between Dora's thighs, took a deep breath and filled her mouth with another woman's pussy meat. A shiver of revulsion travelled through her frame as she sucked labia and clit between her lips and stuck her tongue deep into the hole. It was so wrong. It was so forbidden. But once she'd gone there, something changed, some primordial dark force awakened within her and suddenly she wanted to suck cunt. She longed to slurp and taste meaty minges, to suck the very cum juice out of them. She had become a beast, a sub-human thing. But she didn't care.

"Abandon yourselves!" she cried. "There will be time enough for humanity once we make it through this week. Do it for the Dykes! Eat each other's cunts!"

And then it was a free-for-all. Legs quivered as tongues found just the right spot. And all of the girls secretly took the same journey from revulsion to obsession that their leader had taken before them. They wouldn't dare admit it. They continued to pretend revulsion, but a door had been opened that could never truly be closed again.

When rescuers found them they were barely able to talk after the exertion their tongues had undergone during all that time.

They were welcomed back to the roller derby world as heroines. But dark rumours continue to persist that, once a year, on the anniversary of their rescue they gather in secret and eat the forbidden fruit between each others legs.