Woody Allen once said that sex was the most fun he'd ever had without laughing. But laughing and sex are not mutually exclusive. Horniness brings on undignified behaviour, and it is all the more fun if we are in on the joke. This blog is a celebration of the funny side of sex and the sexy side of humour. As an author of erotic stories I like to show that sex is more fun when it is playful and silly.

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Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Ode to a Bum

Vesper from Girls Out West

Being sat on all day does you no harm
It robs you of none of your cheeky charm
Though your owner thinks that you're too fat
You are what I most fervently long to pat
Even when you were sitting upon the crapper
You inspired a song from LL Cool Jay the rapper
Millions of guys dream of you while wanking
But what you most desire is a painful spanking
Hidden deep between your fleshy globes
Is a tight little hole that welcomes probes
Let me slide my hotdog between your buns
You inspirer of some of my cheesiest puns
I know you can't hear me as you have no ears
But you really are the queen of all the rears
You sublime and sensuous panty stretcher
Inspirer of unending lust in this dirty lecher


  1. you ain't afraid to make an arse of yourself, are you? ;-D brill poem!

  2. Actually wait no it's not, lol just realized I have a tattoo My bad

  3. Hi, Sarah. Feel free to send me a photo for purposes of comparison. :oP

  4. Yes, cheesy puns about buns...I wonder how many of those there are out there btw?

  5. I think most of them were used by Spinal Tap in their song Big Bottom. :o)