Woody Allen once said that sex was the most fun he'd ever had without laughing. But laughing and sex are not mutually exclusive. Horniness brings on undignified behaviour, and it is all the more fun if we are in on the joke. This blog is a celebration of the funny side of sex and the sexy side of humour. As an author of erotic stories I like to show that sex is more fun when it is playful and silly.
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Monday, September 5, 2011
A Close Shave : Fuck Me Friday
Fuck Me Friday is late this week. It turned into Sexy Saturday, and now, for me, it is more like Masturbation Monday. But, better late than never, I have a little poem for you responding to the prompt word #blade. Check out Aisling Weaver's site for more info.
A Close Shave
When I parted her legs and sucked on her clit
My little slut Sally had a giggling fit
How could she keep sucking my prominent pickle
When my big fuzzy beard her pussy did tickle
I docked my hard cock in her sloppy wet harbour
Then she dragged me off to visit the barber
The hairdresser we found was a hot hippy chick
Whose warm free love aura befriended my prick
As her sharpened straight razor scraped bare my chin
I thought of her pussy and how to get in
She cannot have been more than nineteen years old
The nearness of her body was making me bold
I discreetly reached 'round and spanked her behind
She gave me a sly wink and pulled down the blind
Sally sat by, not the least bit furious
She loves to swing and is most bi-curious
"I want a clean shaven man to suck my twat,"
She told the hairdresser for whom she was hot.
"Want a bare pussy for when he does lick it?
"Then a Brazilian could be just the ticket
"You've got me thinking about things hot and lewd
"I'll give you a free wax if I can be nude."
Off came her tight jeans, her bra and her panties
I felt just as high as snow on the Andes
Her armpit hair was as red as a clown's nose
Her pubes were braided into perfect cornrows
As the hair she removed from Sally's cunt
With my finger for her g-spot I did hunt
She told me, "My work is done. I love to play."
Then with her cunt juice my whole face she did spray
I ended by fucking her up the arse hard
After lubing it up slick with some pomade
That expert wielder of a sharp razor blade
Is a delightfully fuck-mad saucy maid
When we managed to make her little toes squirm
Our barbershop threesome set just like a perm.